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The Orlando Bloom Audition Process OR Orlando Bloom Fucking Sucks

Anybody see Kingdom of Heaven? Yes, it sucks, but that’s not my point. My point is that Orlando Bloom plays a blacksmith, again. He also has a sword, again.

Basically, when Orlando Bloom walks into an audition, he asks, “Can I play a blacksmith? No? Well do I at least get to play with a sword? ROCK ON, I’M IN!”

Orlando Bloom cannot act. He plays the same characters and the same roles. That is not acting. That is being yourself. Yes, I just called Orlando Bloom a fucking sword-carrying blacksmith. Got a problem with it, bitch? That’s right… And what?!?

Orlando Bloom is the worst actor ever. He has zero range. If his range were a food that sucks it’d be really bad dog food. Put him in a Tarantino movie, at least let him get typecasted by somebody who’s cool.

And one more thing, Orlando, you’re not hot. Girls don’t want you. I know, it stings, doesn’t it?

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This entry was posted on Sunday, June 26th, 2005 at 4:26 pm and is filed under Bozzy's World. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.

4 Responses to “The Orlando Bloom Audition Process OR Orlando Bloom Fucking Sucks”

  1. peter Says:
    September 18th, 2005 at 6:29 pm

    yes i completley agree rock on. lindsey lohan (soo hott!!)

  2. laura Says:
    July 22nd, 2006 at 11:27 pm

    is someone a little jealous..?

  3. Bozzy Says:
    July 23rd, 2006 at 9:02 am

    No.

  4. Paul Says:
    July 28th, 2006 at 2:20 pm

    Totally agree. Orlando Bloom is the worst actor, but i disagree on Tarantino, he sucks too. Every movie is “hmm how can I make this more pointless and more gorey than my last movie.”

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