Thursday, May 22, 2003

You might be a redneck if...

Just thought I would share my favorite redneck jokes...

...your front porch collapses and four dogs get killed.
...on thanksgiving day you decide which pet to eat.
...youíve ever had to siphon gas from your lawn mower to put into your truck.
...you canít visit relatives without getting mud on your tires.
...you know who is actually leading the Winston Cup series.
...you grill spam.
...youíve ever stolen toilet paper.
...your kids trip over the Christmas lights while hunting for Easter eggs.
...you think fast food is hitting a deer at 65 mph.
...you've ever killed a deer, period.
...youíve ever hollered, "You kids quit playin' on that sheet metal."
...your favorite mixed drink includes Yoo-Hoo.
...your screen door has no screen.
...you own half a pickup truck.
...your wife has a set of earrings that you use as a fishing lure.
...you ever say "oh yeah I can fix it".
...you're naked on laundry day.

No, I didn't make those up, those are my favorites...either hearing them or reading them somewhere on the net.

Got one to share?

3 comments:

  1. looks like i might be one...

    I live on a dirt road, Matt Kenseth with Dale Jr. close behind and I can fix anything.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I think I might be a midwest redneck. Matt is the leader in NASCAR points, Jimmie Johnson is second, Dale Jr. is third, Jeff Gordon is fourth and Ryan Newman is fifth. I have 1/2 a pickup truck that is used as a trailer, and there are 7 cars in my yard and only 2 of them work. YEEHAWEE I'M A WISCONSIN REDNECK BOYS!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. I think I might be a midwest redneck. Matt is the leader in NASCAR points, Jimmie Johnson is second, Dale Jr. is third, Jeff Gordon is fourth and Ryan Newman is fifth. I have 1/2 a pickup truck that is used as a trailer, and there are 7 cars in my yard and only 2 of them work. YEEHAWEE I'M A WISCONSIN REDNECK BOYS!!

    ReplyDelete

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